Office Space
Perhaps it was 1982 when Dilbert, clad in a short-sleeved button-up and tie, climbed to the top of Paperwork Mountain, and read from a white dry-erase tablet the Golden Rules of Professionalism in a modulated office voice. The first and perhaps most important being: Thou Shalt NOT be late for WORK. For the most part, I follow this hallowed tenet. Five days a week, I rush like a madwoman in the mornings to punch in ahead of schedule. I’m always on time and usually, annoyingly early.
But there are days when try as you might, you just can’t make it into the cubicle before the workday officially begins. At Blackbook, the dedicated staff—headphones at the ready and hands poised above the keyboard or telephone—begin working at 10:00 AM and it’s non-stop for eight hours, if not more. Last Friday, I was fifteen minutes late which is a good chunk of time wasted. In that amount of time, a productive intern could have unpacked five boxes of magazines (probably ten with a helper), sprinted to SoHo to drop off a package, or have transcribed two minutes of an interview. While I knew the fifteen minutes were gone forever, I was determined to double my efforts to help make up the lost time. I say hello to my editors and make my way to my usual spot in the back, a cubbyhole I had settled into. I had even started to nest—leaving behind work, a water bottle. I even had a chair. More importantly, I discovered that the PC on my desk actually worked which meant I didn’t have to schlep my laptop from Harlem to Union Square anymore. It was intern heaven.
But the pearly gates are quick to slam shut against those who sin and break commandments.
Someone was in my chair. Someone was using my PC. Someone was in my coveted spot and I couldn’t do anything about it. I dawdled too long at the green market. (I knew I shouldn’t have stopped and watched the carrot man peel impossibly thin, orange slivers of my favorite tuber).
I harbor no ill feelings towards the punctual intern who snagged my seat. But as for my colleagues coming in Monday morning, be warned that I have learned my lesson: I’ll get there on time or I’ll get a friend to save me a spot.
-Resalin
